Tuesday, April 19, 2011
I'm going to cut to the chase here...we're pregnant. It's a miracle from God!! I'm having a hard time even soaking it in, but I'm trying to live in the moment and enjoy every second.
Before we found out, we had to wait for nine days after the embryo transfer before they could do the blood test. I stayed nice and positive for a week. I even felt kind of pregnant at times, thinking I tasted the metallic taste in my mouth that I'd read about. I felt strong spiritually, knowing that so many people were praying for us. My mom and dad even put a prayer request in the Wailing Wall for us while they were in the Holy Land.
Well, Sunday morning rolled around and everything went to hell in a hand basket. I saw a little spot of pink and felt like AF was on her way. All the feelings I had from two years ago when we had a failed IVF rushed back. I remembered exactly what it was like to be let down and I knew it was going to be the same this time. I was a mess. We were on the way to church and I just couldn't go. I knew we'd see tons of new-born babies and pregnant moms and that was going to be too much for me. So...we went to breakfast at Subway in down town Vancouver. The bacon, egg and tear sandwich tasted terrible. I saw the sappiest baby go by in his stupid little sunglasses, bobbing along in his dumb Baby Bjorn and I felt like throwing a binkie at him (that was the devil talking in my head at the time of course). Bryan was comforting and managed to stay positive for me thankfully. As the day went on, I felt better. One of my friends was very stern with me about the fact that I did not know that my babies had not implanted! It was kind of like she said "STOP IT" only in a nice, loving way--just what I needed!
I spent the majority of Monday with my friend Gretchen and baby Noella and we really had a nice relaxing day. At 2:30 Bryan and I both got home at the same time. The doctor had called and left a message for us! We played it on speaker and that's when we got the happiest news ever. Our beta was 150 (great) and hormone levels looking good.
Later in the afternoon I got invited to shop for maternity clothes with my life-long friend Dana who's 20 weeks along and her mom Susie. Wow--that actually sounded like FUN (and it was). I couldn't even fathom buying maternity clothes yet, but I did get two little onesies for the babies. Afterwards I went out and bought a home pregnancy test just so I could take the picture at the top.
The next step is our second blood test--tomorrow. They hope to see the numbers double. Then I'll be scheduled for a 6 1/2 week ultra sound. We should be able to tell if there are one or two little guys in there and maybe hear heartbeat(s). I can already tell this is going to be an interesting part of this journey! Hoping my faith can stay a little stronger next time I come across a bumpy part in the road.